Jack Frost nipping at your nose, 

 Yuletide carols being sung by a choir,

 and folks dressed up like Eskimos"

Doesn't that conjure up images of the perfect Christmas? Sat in a leather armchair, a crackling log fire on the go, the family sat around enjoying The Sound Of Music, everyone's had a wonderful Christmas lunch, and everyone is happy with their presents.  There are no arguments, just love, peace and goodwill to each other.

Or is your house at Christmas like a triple X rated edition of The Jeremy Kyle Show?

The truth is that for most of us, the reality is somewhere in between; we don't have a perfect Christmas, but we somehow manage not to kill anyone.

But a lot of us are glad to get back to work after Christmas, glad we've survived it, and glad to get back to our comfortable routine.
 
So what's in store for you this year? Are you looking forward with excitement or dread? The reality will be something along the lines of what you are focussing on right now... 

So here are some top tips for a great or better Christmas.

* Take some time to think about how you really want it to be. The law of attraction states that we get what we focus on, so if you think about the things you dislike, you will attract them to you.  If you think about all the good bits, you'll attract them to you instead. Even thinking that I don't want X will attract X to you, so focus on what you want, not what you don't want. 
 
* Set your expectations to positive. Expectations program our subconscious mind to go and get what we expect. There are approximately 9 billion bits of information coming at us every moment, but we can process approximately 7 bits, so what decides what we filter into our conscious mind?  When we set expectations in our mind we are putting the radar on to search out the opportunities and experiences to make it happen. It's not the case that the positive stuff never happens to us, it's just that we don't pick up on it if our radar is set to expect the worst.
 
* Don't sweat the small stuff. In the whole scheme of things, it is just small stuff that can turn things into an issue or problem. What is the whole point of Christmas for you? Is it to have time off work? Spend time with the family? Chill out?  Eat and drink as much as possible?  Whatever the reason is, keep it in mind and ensure it's high on your priority list and don't let the small stuff take over.  
 
* Be grateful.  You cannot be unhappy and grateful at the same time.  Gratitude puts us in an amazing state of grace and happiness.  So be prepared to receive as well as give. As human beings everything we do, we do for some emotional gain - and the giving of gifts at Christmas is usually when we enjoy bringing some happiness to another - so be grateful and give the gift of gratitude back because it will make you happy too. 
 
* Talk to each other openly. Understand what it means to those closest to you to have a great Christmas. We all have rules for things, such as how the dishwasher should be loaded, and our rules are often not the same for others. So what makes a great Christmas for you is not the same for those you will be spending it with - so find out what they want to. Listen and understand others' point of view and express yours too.   
 
* Be flexible.  Those who have the greatest control in any situation are those with the greatest flexibility. This is about responding to those problem situations that occur with creativity and flexibility that will produce the best outcome for everyone. You usually have to give to receive.  
 
* Challenge your negative beliefs. If you do have some negative beliefs about Christmas, think about why you have them. Question them and find some reasons why they may no longer be true. Sometimes our negative beliefs are there to keep us in our comfort zone because without them we may have to confront something. But challenge them, and decide whether you want to keep them or change them for something more positive.
 
I hope these tips are of some use. So what sort of Christmas do you want this year?  Focus on what you want, not what you don't want, and what could you do to make that happen?  
 
As always, give me a call if you would like a chat.

HAVE A WONDERFUL CHRISTMAS.